November 2010
To spare their embarrassment... and to inform some...
Me: Public bathrooms.... only for urination and cleansing the hands.
Unnamed Person: Yeah I agree completely. Maybe even skipping the whole urination part.
Me: Why's that?
Unnamed Person: Well there could be a guy checkin' out your wang at the urinal, or you could accidentally glimpse some dudes junk when zipping up.
Me: Yeah dividers need to be mandatory to avoid that, it's one of the reasons why I use the stalls.
Unnamed Person: ALSO, I hate it when there's splash back.
Me: Amen.
Unnamed Person: ESPECIALLY when some splash makes it into your mouth.
Me: Uh....... that's never happened to me before.
Unnamed Person: What really!? Happens to me ALL THE TIME.
Me: EWW.
Unnamed Person: Maybe my schlong is angled weird.
Me: TOPIC CHANGE
Queued Post #5
They told me i’d never be able to do it. And yet here i stand.
Watch
NINJANESSA.: Fuuuuck you →
ninjanessa:
TANSTAAFL. There Aint No Such Thing As A Free Lunch. Isn’t that what you always preach during your boring ass lessons in class? Well you know what? You give respect to get respect. I fucking hate you with a burning passion. I hate the way you speak to me as if I’m your dog. I don’t give a…
Ahem…. to add to this…. Mr Colonel Sanders/Santa Claus imposter. You need...
I'm her mom.
Carmen: i have a C- in geo! No more D's!
Me: Wow, so proud of you! Making me smile with this good news. I know you try very hard, and it shows. Dang makes me wanna show you off to people. "See this girl?"
Hypothetical Stranger: Yes.
Carmen: "That's my daughter, I raised her goooood"
Me: (How it should go) "She's uber awesome. Grades going up and all that jazz"
Hypothetical Stranger: "Is she your sister?"
Me: "Nah I'm her mom."
Abyss: Strength →
tayroslee:
Strength can be found in the strangest places. I found mine in a solid foundation that always has its doors open for me. It’s going to be disastrous when we have to go separate ways, but at least then I won’t feel like a bother. You’ll be free of me, but till then, I need this strength. Without…
Queued Post #4
In about two months, you’ll be back to your old self, and you will go back to ignoring me. The pattern is pretty consistent. is it fair? no. will i do anything to change it? i’m done trying. efforts wasted. and now back to your regularly scheduled programming: summer.
Why Do Zebras Have Stripes?
fakescience:
Help me out tumblr
gnarlythor:
I need to write a script for a 5 minute movie where there are no cuts and no change and location. Any ideas? Im thinking a Tarantino-esque suspenseful dialogue scene in which everyone dies at the end, but I’m open to other ideas.
paranoia rules all. new shady character introduced to a bunch of close friends. weird past stuns all, arises fear in everyone. paranoia gets the best of...
A SanFran Knight: Oceana Winterball 2010 - Urban... →
riceworld:
We’re doing it big time this year. Senior ASB officers have booked club mist for the location of this years Winterball. Yeah thats right a club. Heres the features of the club. It’s 35 dollars for individual tickets and 60 if you buy two tickets. :D Guess passes will be served for this event. So…
Queued Post #3
Quit lying to me. I know you are, I’ve known you for too long to not be able to catch it when you’re lying to my face. I know you’re hiding something, it’s obvious. you’re not the same anymore and it makes me feel disappointed. all i want to do is help and you lie to me, pushing me away. you know you need someone to talk to, why are you distancing yourself from us? do...
“Sounds like a plan”
– Me, goodnight all. 