It’d be something meaningful to do, at least right now. I’m probably one of many people who are just lounging around at home. alone. doing absolutely nothing, nothing productive, nothing meaningful, fun, notable, active, or even at the very least doing something with company. yay me.
sure there’s family, it’s a stretch going through the morning, without being fed up with the constant berating and ever present drabble and nagging to clean. the house IS clean. and dealing with that kind of irking drives one (me) into their (my) room. with nothing to do, no place to go, and no one to talk to except you guys who are reading this right now because you’re in the same state as i am. saddening isnt it? that i can’t get out of the house and use this mind for something more… purposeful.
Yet the fun doesn’t end there, oh no. as my mind soaks up all the blogs, videos, forum posts, news articles, pictures, and noise i always come across a bit of something. this bit of something is probably the biggest insult to my inert state. not in it’s offending, no nothing like that. it’s in the fact that i can’t do anything about it. every time i’m forced back to the internet i’m seeing all sorts of people doing SOMETHING. fun, productive, MEANINGFUL. and a pang of jealousy hits me. a wave of emotions all rolled up in one package. anger, frustration, bitterness, resent, and even a bit of happiness for that person or people’s own fun. why can’t my life be like that? why is it always that i’m here? why can’t i make memories? don’t answer that. i know what the answer is already.
having the answer doesnt help though. i have the answer, but it’s so hard to apply it to my life. well not life, but more about my own priorities, how i spend my time and how i react to things. and after writing that i realize that kinda applies to life. dammit. if things are going to change then it’s going to take a while. god damn introspection. when you’re alone you really start to think and start to hate yourself. can one really commit to change after living so long in the same habit and routine? i’m not writing for your benefit, hell if i know whether i’m writing for my own. i’m not some deep guy as most people make me out to be. i sound final, but sometimes i don”t even know whether i should trust those conclusions or not.
all these questions from a single picture on the internet… sigh…… i guess it’s time to just run with things and get going. who knows if i’ll fail…
actually i got two. yay me!
now to get that surfing one.
if he listens to my advice it might have a change of being average.
Gyarados = Thrash, Ice Beam, Strength, Surf. About to learn hydro pump. Should i delete thrash or should i wait to delete strength and then just reteach it to him?
get rid of the HMs. have it learn hydro pump and teach it the earthquake TM. give the HMs to another pkmn that you can always pull from the pc when you need them. earthquake for those pesky electric types. they have 4x damage on gyarados. or you can just keep surf b/c it’s a decent move and just totally skip out on hydropump
Okay. I’ll tell you. You are the worst person I know. You constantly hit on your best friend’s wife. The man pays for your food and rescued you from certain death, and this is how you repay him? And to add insult to injury, you defecate all over his yard. And you’re such a sponge. You pay for nothing. You always say, “Oh, I’ll get you later.” But later never comes. And what really bothers me, is you pretend you’re this deep guy who loves women for their souls when all you do is date bimbos. Yeah, I date women for their bodies, but at least I’m honest about it. I don’t buy them a copy of Catcher in the Rye and then lecture them with some seventh grade interpretation of how Holden Caulfield is some profound, intellectual. He wasn’t. He was a spoiled brat. And that’s why you like him so much— he’s you. God, you’re pretentious! And you delude yourself by thinking you’re some great writer, even though you’re terrible. You know, I should have known Cheryl Tiegs didn’t write me that note. She would have known there’s no “A” in the word “definite.” And I think what I hate most about you is your textbook liberal agenda, how we should “legalize pot, man,” how big business is crushing the underclass, how homelessness is the biggest tragedy in America. Well, what have you done to help? I work down at the soup kitchen, Brian. Never seen you down there. You want to help? Grab a ladle! And, by the way, driving a Prius doesn’t make you Jesus Christ. Oh, wait, you don’t believe in Jesus Christ, or any religion for that matter, because “religion is for idiots.” Well, who the hell are you to talk down to anyone? You failed college twice. Which isn’t nearly as bad as your failure as a father. How’s that son of yours you never see? But you know what? I could forgive all of that, all of it, if you weren’t such a bore. That’s the worst of it, Brian. You’re just a big, sad, alcoholic bore.
(exhales) Well, see ya, Brian. Thanks for the fucking steak.
I’m setting up this blog to go up later. maybe tmo in fact. so if youre reading this then know that i’m writing this from yesterday. sunday. today would be monday. OR even tuesday. yeah b/c i’m just that random.
so apparently i’m leanne’s cousin… not for real of course just for a play. i’m subbing for in for eric since he cant make it on BAM night. this should be interesting. but seriously though how random is that? i saw the first show and i have a general idea of how i’m supposed to act, but now that i think about it, i won’t be able to pull my usual stunt of just ad-libbing my way thru a performance, as all adv. theatre kids do. hopefully i’ll get some practice on that soon.
but yeah this performance may conflict with my current BAM plans.
Miss D is hopefully coming back for the cafe portion of BAMX. it’s just that we miss her is all and that it’d be great to say hi and catch up. plus i want to play some guitar at the cafe.
then after that i would like to pop back into the bam shack and play some smash like last year. if it’s as cool as it was last year.
dunno why i’m writing about this. just popped into my head and i thought about it for a good half hour. BAM is usually a good time for me i like it and it’s pretty relaxing. i highly recommend going if you can. plus FOOD.